A Message from Joyce Chadwick Concerning Child and Spouse Abuse |
My mother, Joyce Chadwick died on October 25, 1997 from colan cancer. If she could talk to the young wives,mothers and girlfriends of pedophiles this is the message she would give. I am doing it for her now. D.A. Chadwick |
Anna Erwin with her children. Joyce is on the right. |
The first question anyone asks is, Why didn't you leave? It is a good one and as I look back on my life I can see it all clearly now. When I was young my father left my mother with three children and one on the way with the farewell statement of "Go to work or starve." Though it wasn't Mom's fault that we came from a broken home and were poor, other people made fun of us anyway. The stigma left me with a very low self esteem and I was extremely shy. When I was introduced to Allan Chadwick at sixteen he seemed very shy and harmless. I knew I wanted to marry him. I know the signs must have been there and my family wasn't wild about him, but like any young woman in love I didn't take heed. I have often chastised myself for being so naive and ignorant in the ways of the world. Allan joined the army and took me away from my support group and I know now that was all part of the plan. He started abusing our children in Okinawa. I have to admit that I hardly knew anything about sex, much less anything of a perverted nature. This was in the early sixties and divorce and pedophilia were not much talked about. When I confronted him Allan cried and begged for forgiveness and told horror stories about his childhood. |
Too make a 39 year story short, he used this tactic often throughout our marriage. I tried to hate this man and often wanted to tell my mother and sister, but the humiliation and pain of the situation would not allow me to do it. Allan was attached to the Pentagon and associated with the CIA. Our mail was censored, phones tapped and my oldest children were photographed while playing or walking to school. It was a scary situaiton and overwhelming. Nothing meant more to me than my children and I was horrified of losing them. The army made Allan get counseling and I never felt like leaving him was an option. I was twice criticized by the army for doing things they did not like, such as writing to the Chinese embassy to find out what happened to a POW named Capt. Lewis Smith. Allan was furious because he had to answer for my actions. I did not think I did anything wrong. He was something special and his wife and children were not. |
I know that it seems foolish and naive now, but I thought that the fear of being punished by the army would stop him from abusing the kids anymore. I thought I could stop him and at the same time spare my kids the shame of being from a poverty striken, single parent home. I have always been a postive person who believes there is good in everyone. I was wrong. I am sorry for the pain he caused my kids and for the damage he did to them. I realized too late that I meant absolutely nothing to Allan Chadwick. He was delighted when he was told I was not going to live. He was cruel to me when I was sick and abandoned me at a time when I should have had the loving comfort of a spouse. Fortunately, I had my children, mother and sister who cared for me and saw at least part of my wishes fulfilled. |
This is my message to you wives and girlfriends who find yourself involved with a pedophile; Allan Chadwick had a supportive wife, the army to cover up for him and numerous shrinks to supposedly help him. It all failed. He never stopped abusing children and I often wonder now if he abused anyone else's kids. If you are involved with someone who wants you to have limited contact with your family or friends, then get rid of him. If he screams at your kids, get rid of him, if he physically abuses them, get rid of him and if he ever sexually abuses them, CALL THE POLICE!!!! and GET RID OF HIM! You cannot help a child molestor and he probably married you to produce victims. He is a criminal of the worst kind and needs to go to prison. Ignore the crying, begging on his knees, I'll get help promises and whining about his horrible childhood. HE HAS NO RIGHT TO TAKE HIS PROBLEMS OUT ON YOU OR YOUR CHILDREN. GET RID OF HIM!!! You can make it without him. You are not stupid, ugly, fat, worthless or incapable of making a living. You are a victim too even though you probably do not realize it. Mental and emotional abuse can make a person believe they are trapped and dependent on an abuser. Do Not Keep the Secrets of a Pedophile. Send Him to Prison NOW. |
When my mother died, Allan Chadwick took down her photos as an older adult and put up the ones of her as a child.......I believe that action speaks for itself. D.A. Chadwick |
Joyce Chadwick 1939 to 1997 " Watching Over Her Children From Above" The inscription engraved on the back of her headstone |
It wasn't like Mom had a great deal of help from society either. My brother Mark told cops, ministers, counselors, youth workers and a group home manager the source of his problems and not one of those people ever suggested that Allan Chadwick move out or do prison time. I wet the bed because I was too lazy to get up, Mark vandalized property because he needed to be on Ritlan and dear old Dad abused us because his wife wouldn't put out to his satisfaction. It was everyone's fault but his. Menniger's in Topeka, Kansas told my Mom while we were in group therapy that in these cases the blame could usually be put on the wife. When she does not perform to his satisfaction, he has no choice but to turn to his children. IS THERE REALLY ANY WONDER WHY CHILD ABUSE DOES NOT STOP IN AMERICA? WOMEN AND CHILDREN ARE STILL CONSIDERED A MAN'S PROPERTY AND THAT IS THE ROOT OF THE PROBLEM! |
I will not allow my mother or brother's life and death to be in vain. I have a personal vendetta against those who prey on the weak and I will not stop my campaign until chickenhawks stop getting a free ride. Anyone who does not believe pedophiles are still a problem need to surf the web more. They have web pages where they openly and proudly declare their " Preference for children" They equate themselves with the gay rights movement, which is an insult and an outrage. Pedophiles are now "coming out" and see themselves as victims of society. There is no forgiveness for crimes against children. "Those that forget the past, are condemned to repeat it." |
What is the "incest exception"? The "incest exception" is the special opportunity the law gives to certain sex offenders in most states. It allows offenders related to the victim by blood or marriage to be charged with "incest," instead of "child sexual abuse" or "rape of a child." This "charge bargaining" is a covert form of "plea bargaining," and it can allow predators who grow their own victims to escape prison. |
" Silence is a Lethal Weapon:Surviving Childhood with a Sadistic Pedophile". Available now at Barnes & Noble and Amazon.com It is a survival guide for those trapped living with an abuser. |
 This INTO THE LIGHT: Survivors and Friends site is owned by D.A. Chadwick A Mother's Message. Want to join the INTO THE LIGHT: Survivors and Friends? |
|---|
| [ Next][ Skip Next][ Previous][ Skip Previous][Random Site][ Next 5 Sites][List Sites] |
Check out this excellent tale of survival and Susan Kesegich's web site |
Going Against the Odds |
 |
The Stop The Violence SiteRing This site owned by |
| |
Do not under estimate the power of mental and emotional abuse. My father was an expert at psychological warfare |
A Mother's Message |
D.A. Chadwick |
M o m ' s f a v o r i t e s o n g w a s M u l l o f K i n t y r e a n d h e r f a v o r i t e i n s t r u m e n t t h e b a g p i p e s . W e ' r e S c o t c h - I r i s h a n d s u r v i v o r s ! |
<body>
SiteRing by Bravenet.com
--------------- END BRAVENET CODE ---------------
|
 |
The Labyrinth Of People MPD SiteRing This site owned by A Mother's Message Sherry et al |
| [Previous] [List Sites] [Random Sites ] [Join ] [Next ] | |
